Mentor Notebooks and Leadership Education

live.
This week I hope to 'live' outside! Heading to a park this morning with some of my homeschooling peeps. And, if the weather holds out, I'm hoping to check out some nature parks with the kids for outdoor sketching. 

The meal planning service I subscribed to last week is quite fun! You choose your menus and recipes and then printout a grocery list. They offer a new menu every Thursday, but the archives of past menus are there too. Lots of room for customization too. I'm sure there are many such services and apps, but here's a sample of what we ate last week:

• grilled vegetable wraps with rice pilaf (delish!)
• baked ziti with chicken sausage (ok)
• baked potato soup with BLTs (yummy!)

Tonight we're having Baja Marinated Chicken on the grill, together with Black Bean & Rice Salad. See - I would never think of that on my own!

faith.

BIG feast day coming up this week, well actually two feast days. The first is on Wednesday - we celebrate St. Joseph the Worker. Then on Friday, the Apostles Saint Philip and Saint James. I was thinking of doing a  monthly fast on the First Friday of the month, but looks like this month isn't the best one to start. 

homeschool.

This is the heart of my post today. I want to introduce to you one of the tools I learned about at the DeMille Seminar on Leadership Education last weekend - one that I am CERTAIN will have a huge impact on our family. Maybe yours, too.

It's the "Mentor Notebook." 

Very high tech, isn't it. A notebook and pen.

You are a mentor to your children, whether you are homeschooling or not. You may be a mentor to others as well. Maybe you're a teacher or a youth minister or a grandparent. Either way, as a mentor its valuable to spend some time thinking about how YOU can do your job better.

Here is what you do.

You have a meeting every week with your notebook and pencil. That's right, just you, your notebook and a pencil.

You write each child's name on a page of his/her own, from babes-in-arms to your oldest, everyone gets a page. Include a page for your spouse and yourself as well. You can be as comprehensive as to include anyone you are in a close relationship with - grandparents, grandkids, Godchildren, close friends, whatever. But that can be a bit overwhelming, so start with your children and spouse first.  Everyone gets a page.

 My name is in the next section. Mamas always seem to put themselves last!

The next step:

For each person in your notebook, you sit and brainstorm ways and ideas of what each person needs this week. What can YOU do to SERVE him/her? What does he/she need in order to better excel this week? What would INSPIRE that person this week?

You brainstorm and write down as many things as you can think of - some of these may be bad ideas! Or just unworkable! That's OK! But in all likelihood, there will be one or two things that you can deliver on this week to help your child succeed. You need not fill in an entire page either. Next week, when you repeat this process on a fresh page for that child, you can look at the previous week and check off what you delivered on. Or you can throw that old piece of paper away too, if you like ... but the idea is still the same.

Brainstorm, plan and deliver.

Sunday night at my kitchen table. The bigs are out with Dad, the littles are in bed ... ahhhh. Wait a minute, where's the wine? 

This is not something you share with the people on the list - you don't want to create an expectation at this point. Later, maybe for the older scholar-phase kids, you can have them go through the same process then compare. But not now.

This IS something you do weekly and consistently. You and your spouse can each do this exercise separately for your children, then compare lists. That's a wonderful idea because women and men have different perspectives that can truly benefit your children.

Your ideas need not be confined to academics either. Maybe you have an intuition that your child just needs lots of hugs this week or special attention. Do that. Or maybe you sensed a spark of interest in something your child read about and you want to find an experiment or book to light that fire. Perhaps your toddler is having problems with sharing and you want to find a storybook on that topic for said toddler. The Mentor Notebook applies to everyone in the family.

You know your children better than anyone else; you are the expert! So often during the course of a week I will have a specific thought about what my child might really enjoy or something I need to find for that child, but I don't write it down or the thought fizzles among the million things there are to do in a day. I think the Mentor Notebook will help make my reflections more consistent and produce results.

We are having a Mentor Notebook Challenge on the TJEd Forum (TJEd Muse) I belong to, and please let me extend that challenge to you, too! The challenge is to create a Mentor Notebook and then try to set aside time weekly (I like Sundays) to do it. If it seems too overwhelming to do for all of your children at once, then spread it out over a week or more. One mom has already mentioned that she does a daily reflection on the needs of her children after spending about 10 minutes reading her Core Book (for me that would be the Bible). That is a great idea too.

We will be reporting back to each other on the forum every Sunday for a while, to share experience and insights. Kind of like an experiment. You should try this too. Let me know what you think!

[sew].

I'm not sure what or even if I will sew this week! I would like to get to some leggings for the girls but ... things are a bit crazy already ... we'll have to see how it all shakes out.

Have a wonderful week and God bless all your mentoring endeavours!!

Young Explorers - Block 1 Day 3

Howdy howdy!
We were rowdy today in YE. We spent most of the morning outside since it was just. so. glorious.  Here's what we did today.

1. Icebreaker
This morning, I invited any child who wanted to share something interesting they did over the past week. However, I asked them to stand up beside me, in front of the group, and do their telling. This is just a baby step towards being comfortable with public speaking, and most everybody took part :).
 I am so proud to see them display courage! One child who initially said they weren't ready to speak actually did stand up at the end and gave a little speech. Awesome!

2. 7 Habits of Happy Kids - Habit #3 - "Put First Things First. Work first, then play."
Before we even formally began our morning, some of the children were already asking if we were going to do another habit today! In today's habit, Pokey the Porcupine learned the hard way that you should study for a spelling test well in advance instead of pursuing playtime. We talked about the word "procrastination," (hey everyone I've never even heard of that word, honest haha!) and what it means. We shared what our most important responsibilities are at home, and talked about what it feels like to just do your job rather than put it off and put it off. We shared what it feels like to wake up in a clean room versus a messy room and asked WHY it feels so good to be in a clean orderly place. You might want to ask your kids WHY. I would suggest that our God is a God of order, so it only makes sense that we feel better when things are in order, no? (We did not discuss this last sentence - I leave that to let your kids discover for themselves with you).

3. Poetry - "The Mischievous Dog."
This is just a cute nonsense poem with pleasant rhyme, written by Dylan Thomas when he was 11 years old. I didn't share the title with the kids at first, and asked them to guess "who" was speaking in the poem. Enjoy!

The Song of the Mischievous Dog

by Dylan Thomas

There are many who say that a dog has its day, 

And a cat  has a number of lives;

There are others who think that a lobster is pink,

And that bees never work in their hives. 

There are fewer, of course, who insist that a horse

Has a horn and two humps on its head,

And a fellow who jests that a mare can build nests

Is as rare as a donkey that's red. 

Yet in spite of all this, I have moments of bliss,

For I cherish a passion for bones,

And though doubtful of biscuit, I'm willing to risk it,

And I love to chase rabbits and stones.

But my greatest delight is to take a good bite

At a calf that is plump and delicious;

And if I indulge in a bite at a bulge,

Let's hope you won't think me too vicious.

4. Living Math - Shadows, Value Scales & Thales

With the weather forecast looking so good, we needed to take advantage of it! We did sidewalk-chalk living math outside, based on a lesson from Family Math.  We did two things: first we explored shadows by tracing our feet, then measuring the length of our shadows from those same footprints every half hour. It was a sunny day; perfect for this activity. 

We wondered why those shadows kept shrinking and shifting. I asked them how this observation could be useful ... we talked about sundials and telling time and making those connections. Then I told them the story of Thales and the pyramids - rumor has it he was visiting the pyramids and asked his guide how tall the pyramids were but his guide didn't know - nobody knew! Thales used shadows and proportions to make the calculations. That story really came alive for them today!

Second - we drew out a number line in chalk, marking spaces from 0 to 10. We discussed the concept of "values" scales - tell me on a scale of 0 to 10 how much you like pizza.  Or, if 0 is no and 10 is yes, do you like pizza and pop? The entire group hopped around the values scale as I asked them questions. Then, I let each child take a turn asking a question and analyzing the results. They could tell if something was "popular" or not. Onions are all over the board, and mushrooms are not popular at all. We discussed how researchers can design questionaires to gain information this way, and even hospitals use this type of question to help describe the severity of your pain. It was interesting to see the wheels turn as the kids actually had to "analyze" and "describe" their results. One child looked at me and said "THIS IS SO MUCH FUN!"

5. Socratic Discussion: The Proud Grain of Wheat by Frances Hodgson Burnett

This is a short story about two grains of wheat in a sack - one is proud but the other spends her time thinking and learning and is modest and humble. We follow each grain of wheat as they get sown into the ground, become blades, then crowns of wheat, ears, are threshed, etc. At each step, the proud grain of wheat thinks she is better than all the rest and makes whatever situation she is in seem very high indeed. Well, you can guess what eventually happens to the grain of wheat ... We will be discussing the virtues of humility in greater depth tomorrow.  We enjoyed this story outside while eating our snack; I - a lovely red apple. Ahem.

6. Picture Study - Van Gogh

It seemed appropriate to study "The Sower" (one of his many versions) and "Stacks of Wheat." He has many many wheat field portrayals. Today we did the normal study then hide the picture - then ask the kids questions. But we took it a step further and I asked for volunteers to actually try a "narration" where they stand and describe everything they remember about the piece and that worked really well.

We viewed art right after reading the Proud Grain of Wheat, in which there was a sower. When I told the kids this picture was called "The Sower (with Arles in Background), there were several "a-ha's" as they were able to visualize what a "sower" actually does and might look like. 

Stacks of Wheat. Some kids thought they looked like volcanoes. I guess when you don't see this in today's age, it must look very strange!

7. Composer - Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata - First Movement

We noted how sad and solemn and quiet the piece sounds. And how very famous it is.  This piece is "easy" to play in terms of the notes, but it is very difficult to play properly, with the right technique - most people butcher it (especially me!), but its complexity is found in its simplicity.  We listened to this version of the 1st Movement on You Tube.  But if you are at home with a few minutes to spare, consider comparing it to Wilhelm Klempff's version - hear the difference?  I am in awe at how the kids really listen and seem to thoughtfully consider the music they hear - by their comments, you can tell their hearts are made for this beauty felt in music. 

8. End with Read-Aloud - Wolves of Willoughby Chase

We wrapped up the last ten minutes of class with another chapter of Wolves. Earlier in the morning they asked if we were going to read Wolves today, and were high-fiving when I said yes - and I am not surprised in the least! Read-alouds and socratic discussion are not only good for the brain, they are just so enjoyable!  That's the wonderful thing about any classic - while we have lofty goals for thinking via the classics, they most importantly fully delight our souls!!

See you all tomorrow for another great morning!

TJEd - the Good and Bad

There are many criticisms of TJEd aka Leadership Education. I have grappled with some myself over the years; it is why I have never really fully embraced the philosophy, not fully (see this post).  I won't go into the criticisms (you can google that), but perhaps the misgivings, for me personally, stem from the fact that the author Oliver deMille and 95% of the TJEd machine and followers are of a drastically different faith than I am.  By "machine/follower" I mean co-authors, authors of related books on TJEd, online 'Leadership' schools, many TJEd forum members, and online classes for TJEd moms. OK, I don't have hard statistics to back that up, but I think its safe to say by far the majority are of a VERY different religious background, and therefore different worldview.  Why is this all a misgiving to me? Can't someone of a different faith than I  create a new approach to education? Of course Of course!! But let's just say, I need to be more careful, more vigilant, ever discerning what I read and buy into of TJEd, in order to ensure it does not run contrary to my own belief system. Fair? Every author comes with bias of some sort, right? And as discerning readers we have to continually question and critically assess.  Oliver deMille has written several books recently, not necessarily related to TJEd and homeschooling, and I see some elements I do not agree with.  An example, in the book TJEd for Teens he and his co-author recommend a Teen Top 100 booklist.  Some of the books on the list are ... his own.  I'm sure he truly believes they should be there. But ... I don't necessarily buy in.  In the same book, he defines "key mission areas" that we all fall into when we discern our purpose in life.  He uses interesting categories, some of which fall directly out of the Catholic's Corporal Works of Mercy such as to 'feed the hungry,' but the list also includes 'to create wealth' as a personal mission.  I'm not sure that creating wealth would qualify as one's *main* purpose in life from a Catholic perspective. I guess if you are "called to create wealth" for the benefit of others ... maybe a case could be made?  But, from a Catholic perspective, I have read that prosperity is more dangerous than poverty, and this I believe to be true. So, in the end, as with everything, prayerful discernment is necessary for a Catholic parent and homeschooler. Always.

Another hesitation I have.  DeMille has put together the "7 Keys of Great Teaching" and even added an 8th Key as TJEd has evolved.  I love the 7 Keys.  I use them to a certain extent, but not exclusively.  Was Thomas Jefferson actually educated by his mom using the 7 Keys? Of course not.  The 7 Keys were put forward by deMille based on his research, thoughts, and opinions.  So TJEd, as a modern educational philosophy, has not *really* been tested scientifically to determine if in fact this approach creates "leaders" and "statesmen," other than the idea that some of the Founding Fathers of America would have studied classics and had mentors and would have taken ownership of their own education.  But you know what? The 7 keys overlap other educational philosophies (such as reading and studying the classics).  So I'm not all that fussed over the fact that TJEd is relatively new and untested.  I do love so many elements of TJEd that I'm willing to accept the fact there are imperfections, and tweak it the way I want.  My experience on the TJEd forums leads me to believe that others are doing the same - tweaking and modifying. That's okay.

But here's what I'm excited about today. I recently participated in a free trial class for moms through the online Abigail Adams Academy.  We read and discussed a speech by Gandhi.  It was WONDERFUL!! What a treat to bring together other women from different parts of the continent to have a scholarly discussion! I plan on being a regular attendee beginning in the fall. And that brings me to:

Key of Great Teaching #7:   "You, not them." 


(otherwise known as: don't ignore yourself in the process of home-educating your children)


One thing I know for sure about TJEd, it has inspired thousands of moms, in the trenches like me, in the thick of motherhood and homeschooling, to work on their own education and make themselves better people by studying and discussing the classics. Writing about them.  Working on their own Core and Love of Learning phases.  I am so grateful!! Another thing I know for sure? This approach to education, this TJEd stuff - its different than everything else I've used/seen/read about.  It aspires to all the lofty ideals like character, virtue, relationship, true education. I like that.

Have a great week, God bless you.

Conveyor belt: what is it really?

Recently on a forum, a homeschooling mom made a tongue-in-cheek confession that she loved a good conveyor belt.  I'm sharing with you some excerpts of my response to her :).


Remember that TJEd concept of conveyor belt education? Its where everybody hops on the belt (preschool or kindergarten), then gets the same education, at the same time and pace, without consideration of individual learning needs or interests.  At the end of the belt (eg grade 12), you get the "stamp of approval" (diploma), you hop off, and you get a job. Or go on to another conveyor belt (eg college).  In a conveyor belt model, you are told what to think. But not how to think. 

In the homeschool area, I think the conveyor belt is more of a mentality than an entity:

A mentality that the "plans" (such as a school-in-a-box curriculum) must be followed to the tee in order for real learning to occur. Or that you must have plans at all.


A mentality that we must check, check, check the items off the list, irrespective of the individual student's learning needs, desires and abilities. 


A mentality of one size fits all and the size is not dictated by you but by someone else. 


Please don't fall into that trap. Its the sure path to mommy burnout and kills any love of learning.

During a couple of my pregnancy/baby years, we used Sonlight curriculum - a packaged school-in-a-box that comes with ready-made lesson plans and a schedule for 36 full weeks of school.  This would be considered a conveyor belt, because someone else made these plans.  Yet, we loved it! The reason we loved it and why it worked was because I did not approach it with conveyor belt mentality.


I was very careful to make it work for us, and not be a slave to its plans and checklists. We didn't do all the writing assignments, grammar components, etc etc etc. and we didn't finish 36 weeks of lesson plans - nor did I ever expect that we would. Rather, we did what we loved - the reading, the mapping, the Bible memory, the running off on trails for the sake of learning. We used it as a spine and let it be a rough guide. There was no "drudgery" or "work" involved, it was pure pleasure. It inspired the kids, and because of that, we kept it up. I think many people who first buy a boxed curriculum expect to "finish" in the prescribed 36 weeks, but seasoned homeschoolers soon find out that its difficult to stick to someone else's plan and still be happy and sane by the end of the school year. We all either abandon it, or alter it, or burn ourselves out.  Same with any specific "curriculum" for individual subjects - reading, history, math, french - if you expect to get on the conveyor belt at lesson one, and require your kids to complete every. single. page. from start to finish, I think you miss a great opportunity to enjoy the ride of learning. I would bet that at some point it becomes drudgery. And while your kids may now be fluent in french verb conjugation and they are officially performing at grade level of their peers, at what cost did they achieve it? At the cost of love of learning? Wait a minute - that's one of the reasons why I started homeschooling in the first place - because I wanted to instil a great love for learning in my children!!!

Even the TJEd for Teens Top 100 booklist could become a conveyor belt, if approached with the mentality that "these are the top 100 books that every wannabeascholar MUST start with in order to be a scholar, and we will go through each and every one so we can check, check, check them off the list." I certainly don't think that list is the be-all end-all. But, if you use it as a spine or a starting place, tweak here and there, read this one but not that one, then it becomes a great tool! Any list of classics can and should be approached this way; they are after all, a matter of opinion.


My entire point was this: to employ a TJEd or Leadership Education model, we need not be afraid of packaged curriculum per se.  We just need to know how to apply it and not have crazy expectations.  We need to use it concurrently with inspiration. 


Avoid the mentality of the conveyor belt.


  

Homeschool planning: the Compass

"Each binder should include the student's past and current compass - a six month list of everything they want to study, learn and do."

- from Leadership Education The Phases of Learning

You are going to like the Compass.

You will like it, because you are already thinking about next year's school year, aren't you.  You are turning things over in your mind. Making notes. Perusing resources.  Reading.  Some plans are no-brainers, you think, because they are just a continuation from this year. You've already made some decisions.

But.

I would like to encourage you to back up just a bit and ask yourself this question: 

 To what extent have I thoroughly considered my child's strengths, weaknesses, skills and knowledge, and most importantly, their genius and mission 'leanings' in their life? 

This is where the Compass is most helpful in your planning journey.  It provides a highly individualized big-picture vision, a spine for the learning pathway; a nice road-map to revisit on a weekly basis and to re-evaluate about every six months.  It helps provide clarity of thought of where you are at, and where your child is at.  I'm in the process right now, with myself and each of my children (except the 1yr old!).  Remember, one of the 7 Keys of Great Teaching is 'You, not Them'.  This means, you don't ignore yourself and your own education in the process :).

Everyone practising Leadership Education has their own way of implementation, and not a lot of "detail" is provided in the book about what the Compass specifically looks like.  I like that fact, because I can make it into something that works for me; you can do the same.  The Compass is  a six month list of everything the child wants to study, learn and do - a very vague definition and feels unschooly to me.  However, after reading an excellent post on the Compass by wonderful TJEd blogger Celeste, I am implementing an outline based on hers. Thank you, Celeste!

Spend some time with each child discussing and then writing down whatever appeals to you in the following:

1. Strengths - we've all got 'em! Think beyond just academics.  Think character, hobbies and interests, etc.

- What are my favorite things to do?

- What do I excel at?

- What am I really confident in?

- What would my family/friends say I'm good at?

- What virtues are most prominent in me right now?

2. Top Personal Classics 

- make a list of the top classics that have really impacted your life; this is a list you will add to

- maybe you phrase it as the 'best 10 books you've ever read'

- beside each book, make a note as to the general theme or how it impacted you

3. Areas to Strengthen - we've all got these too!

- What needs work?

- Where am I weaker academically?  

- What life-skills do I need to work on?

- What would my family/friends say I can improve upon?

- What virtues do I need to cultivate most right now?

4. Objectives - these should be a natural fall-out from the above.  As a parent, you may be nudging your child in one direction or another

- What books do I want to read in the next six months?  - if 'kindness' is a virtue that needs building upon, maybe the chosen classics or stories revolve around this theme.   

- What part of my Core Book (eg the Bible) do I want to spend time on in the next six months? - for my core kids, we are spending time Bible storybooks that outline salvation history - like a Jesse Tree in storybook form

- How can I go deeper into my favorite things and my passions? - I notice how Dawson loves to work with building things and creating things with his hands, so I'm thinking how I might extend and build upon this love of his - so we bought a kids sandbox kit and he's responsible to build it

- What skills do I want to/need to work on?  For example, my daughter makes the same meal every two weeks - so that she gets really good at it - its my requirement but she gets to pick the meal we work on; the first school year it was roast chicken dinner every other Monday.  

- What academic area(s) do I want to or need to study? - when you answer this question with your kids, it becomes a clear signal where to focus your prep time; child weak in reading? then must find a way to  inspire reading via games, books, experiences, etc

- Are there any other things I want to learn, see or do?

- What is my mission and purpose? - don't be afraid of this one. Of course its not written in stone. But if there are any tendencies at all, even if its very general in nature, write it down. As an example, one of my children said whatever her mission, she wanted to inspire others.

The Compass exercise is not something to whip up in a half-hour, so do spend some time on it and enjoy the process.  Keep a copy of each child's Compass in both your own and each child's binder.  And if you have a child approaching or in Scholar phase, I would encourage you to use "The Real You" exercise in A Thomas Jefferson Education for Teens, as it goes even deeper than the Compass.  It also includes a Teen Top 100 Booklist to work through, if desired.

This week, I'm working on Compasses for the binders.  Join me?

May God grant you all the blessings of an abundant week and an abundant life :)!!

Jumping into core phase

from Leadership Education, regarding the "lessons" that most, if not all, children learn in school:

"The most important thing I can learn right now is skills (displaces the more crucial moral childhood lessons of good-bad, right-wrong, true-false)."


Would you agree that there ARE crucial moral childhood lessons?  If so, what are they?  Have you ever really thought about it?

This is what a TJEd "core phase" of learning is really all about.  And whether you are five years old or fifty, you never really leave this phase of learning but you do build upon it.  Or maybe you never really had a complete core ...

I have 3 little girls in "core phase."  Yet I continue to reinforce core-phase lessons with the rest.  This is the spine that guides you:

good-bad

right-wrong

true-false

informed by your "Core Book"

practiced through Work and Play 

by You First, then Them

As parents we pass a culture to our kids.  One of the very first things our family teaches our babies is manners.  Please? Thank-you! Oh, thank-you Katie!  Katie want a snack? Please?  Here you go. Thank-you!  This is typical momspeak in our house and it never stops.  I commend my other little girls every time they use good manners.  As the kids get older, we teach things like shaking hands when you meet a friend of your mom and dad, and introducing yourself, making eye contact.  We teach the kids to answer the phone by identifying who they are.  The manners and social conduct and graces we teach our kids are part of any good core phase of learning.  Building upon those simple manners, we begin to teach our kids right and wrong in very basic ways.  Its wrong to hit your sister.  Its right to share and be generous.  Its wrong to mouth off to your mom.  Its right to show ready-obedience to your parents. And I love how all of this core learning takes place naturally within a family, by experience and feel.  As they grow, they learn the reality of good and bad, that both do exist.  Think of early fables and tales and how they all sought to instill this concept; and that good prevails.  

I think most parents of small children really do make an effort to provide some sort of boundaries and guidance in good/bad, right and wrong.  Does it stop here?  

What about ... the true-false?  

That must be one of the biggest challenges we face in our morally relativist society and school-system; one that promotes "many truths" all on equal footing and all equally "true."  Where does that leave our children?  Everybody cannot ALL be correct.  So what is the core truth YOU are teaching?  What are YOUR core truths?  Where did you get them from?  What drives your faith and morals? Anything? 

And this is where the "Core Book(s)/Works" comes in.  As a Catholic family, our Core Works include the Bible, and the Catechism.  It informs all of our moral decision-making and behaviours. Our Catholicism is the glue that binds our family together and creates our family and homeschooling culture.  

Here are some ways I am implementing core phase concepts in my home. It has to apply to me personally as well as my children.

Study of the Core Book

* me: study of the Bible and modelling the habit; scripture memory work (see Ann Voskamp at A Holy Experience for wonderful inspiration on memorywork!).  And ... I really need to make more effort to refer to the Catechism on a more regular basis.

* the littles: playing with the Bible - by this I mean Bible storytelling, Bible felt storyboards, read-alouds of Bible stories including little board books, Bible stories on audio (Jim Weiss is great), any kind of manipulatives like a Noah's Ark toy, nativity toys, etc.  We "play" with Scripture memorization via the Suppertime Scripture. I remember my friend telling me the one thing he remembers from his childhood was that his mom told him Bible stories, and it gave him a deep love of Scripture.  Make an effort to have a family devotion time every day!  If you are flying by the seat of your pants, and if you're Catholic, you always have the Daily Mass readings at your internet fingertips. Baby steps!

* the bigs: daily interaction with the Bible and with our faith issues. On most days, the minimum is family gathering for the daily readings.  I have fallen short in encouraging private personal Bible study but ... no homeschool is perfect!  

Prayer - a Core Value

* me: prayer. Morning prayer always. The kids see me pray my Rosary every day.  I have downloaded a monthly breviary to my handy-dandy kindle and I try to pray with it ... when I can ... no mommy is perfect! But I'm definitely always in a dialogue with God.

* all kids: morning prayers (but we forget sometimes); Grace before meals always; weekly family Rosary, evening prayers with littles (bigs are on their own).

Family Work 

* we have always always always done chores and flylady weekly houseblessings, ten-minute-tidy-ups, and so on.  One thing to distinguish in a TJEd core phase model, is little kids should be working alongside you and not getting assigned a chore to go off and complete.  Is there really a difference?  Yes. I originally assigned Alexa (5) the emptying and sorting of the cutlery from the dishwasher to do on her own.  The novelty wore off quickly (expected!). But as soon as I switched to doing it side-by-side with her, it became less of a chore.  Consider then, incorporating side-by-side family work into your day.  The idea is that the lesson of "hard work" begins to be learned from a young age; that when they are older and faced with the "hard work" of scholarly activity they will have already formed a strong work ethic.  This is why, with TJEd/Leadership Education, you can't just jump into say, the scholarly phase, because you aren't really equipped with the skills and values to do it justice.  Another benefit of family work is the kids will learn systems from you that work in home organization and maintenance, not just the how-to of cleaning a bathroom.  Do you have good systems in place to keep your home running?  No?  That is part of your adult core phase.  I can tell you I did NOT learn the true core lessons of self-discipline and doing a complete and thorough job when it came to housekeeping until  .... uhm ... very late in life.  But I have an impeccable model in my own mother whose behaviour I try to emulate here.  Modelling is crucial.

Family Play

* core kids play. Their play is the way they test out "life." They play house and they play family, they practice-play everything they see in their immediate world and I find anything they read or I read to them comes out in their play.  It is so very essential.  Hop in there if you can and make it a family affair, at least some of the time.  I really enjoy being outside with them and just observing all the kids, its quite joyful actually!  

Family Read-Alouds

* there is nothing better than sharing the experience of a great story, a great book. Really. It is foundational in our homeschool.  Even if nothing else occurs in the day, I can guarantee you there will be a story or two read and chatted about.  In addition to the classics, don't be afraid to choose books that reinforce your family's core values, even little storybooks.  Currently, we are reading lots of Frog and Toad by Arnold Lobel, and its all about friendship and kindness!  Funny, I then switched to a math reader where Hare and Rabbit Divide an Apple and they fight over the food every time.  Alexa recognized that "Frog and Toad would never act like that."  So never underestimate the impact of good storybooks, and look for the themes to draw attention to with your kiddos.  They will help solidify the right/wrong, good/bad, true/false for your children.   

You will notice

* that the core phase does not place a strong emphasis on skills like reading, writing and other academics. Not that you *can't* incorporate them, but they are NOT the priority.  And that brings me to the quote I began with - the "crucial moral childhood lessons."  

There is a lot more to study and learn about core phase.  Maybe you want to venture along with me? 

Leadership education

Good morning and what a glorious day! A new day is always such a gift from God, since its coming is never guaranteed!!  I have wonderful plans in mind for the week! For organizing and getting systems in place for our learning; for planning and dreaming; for reading and studying, and yes, even a little bit of sewing!!

Anyway, they are all in my mind so far.

But they are BIG plans!!  And I can't wait to share with you!!  It will have to wait though.  Right now:

I am so incredibly struck by the following excerpt from Leadership Education The Phases of Learning by Oliver and Rachel DeMille, 


because the statements so eloquently confirm what I believe to be true!


"Childhood is when a child's assumptions of basic truths are formed and acquired - not through pedagogy, but through experience. ... here is what many, if not most, children learn:


1. Learning is what I am forced to do by others when I'd rather be enjoying what I discover myself.


2. I will not learn unless I am subject to being put on the spot and made to feel stressed, annoyed, stupid or at least vulnerable because I am out of my comfort zone.


3. Learning is so complicated that full-time teachers are needed to walk me through it (or a homeschool equivalent: Mom has to neglect the younger children/house/personal grooming, etc. and give me her full attention and line-by-line directions or I am incapable of learning).


4. I do not know anything unless someone certifies to me that I do.


5. I am probably wrong about a lot of the stuff I think I know.


6. I have to master this stuff now or I will be behind for the rest of my life.


7. The things I am really interested in are not very important.


8. Learning is one thing and what I feel and experience is another.


9. When I am a Mom/Dad I will worry and "beat myself up" about what I am not doing and wonder if I should be doing what I am doing.


10. When I am a Mom/Dad I will say I know something is the "right" thing and then constantly second-guess my decisions."


And on the flip side, the DeMilles suggest that even if children don't have a negative experience with early academics, it can still be harmful if they become negatively scripted on the hearts of children:

"1. I am really great because I know how to read (subtle lesson: self-worth and comparison evaluation is based on academic achievement and timing rather than truth, right choices, service, repentence, etc.).


2. ______ is dumb because he/she cannot read.


3. I'm cooler than ______ because I am reading before him/her.


4. We work hard on my reading/math/??? because Mom and Dad want to prove to Grandma/neighbor/etc. that they are "good" parents.


5. The most important thing I can learn right now is skills (displaces the more crucial moral childhood lessons of good-bad, right-wrong, true-false).


6. The faster I grow up, the better (this is a huge one, overlooked by most educational analysts with long-lasting implications and impact on young lives)."


the list goes on you will have to grab a copy of the book download it to your handy dandy kindle you won't be able to put it down i highly recommend it




Embrace the day and God bless your week!!

"I command you:

 ... be strong and steadfast! Do not fear nor be dismayed, for the Lord, your God,

 is with you wherever you go."

Joshua 1:9 

Other translations use 'courageous' in place of 'steadfast.'  And this is all about courage.

Can I tell you a story? About my young adult daughter (remember, we aren't calling them teens anymore!)?  She displayed tremendous courage.  She took a risk.  She went out on a limb.  'Cause that's where the fruit is right? (Jimmy Carter)

She is not overly ... athletic.  She swims very well, she skates, but overall she is more the arts/drama/music kinda girl.  For whatever reason, at the age of 14 and on the last day for soccer registration, she decided she wanted to go. for. it.  I get that boys need to test their physical limits as they approach manhood; that they need the rough and tumble wrestling with their dads.  But you know what?  I wonder if girls need some of that too.  I wonder if there was something inside her that needed to know how she would do.  Something inside her that needed to know what it would be like to play on a team. At this age in her life. As a homeschooled girl.

She emailed back and forth with soccer clubs.  She was upfront with the fact that she had no experience.  She was asked to come to a practice so the coach could ... take a look ...

We bought cleats and shin pads and socks and balls ... dug out white T and black shorts.

And for almost two hours, I watched my beautiful 14-yr-old young adult daughter play and drill and kick and run with a group of Under 16 girls who have been doing this for several years.  

And she did not cry ...

She did not cry!!  

She did not cry when the coach said she wasn't going to work out for this team, but that he'd send her over to another coach.  Au contraire!  She walked off that field with a big smile, glowing cheeks and feeling on top of the world!  Isn't this the kind of mountain-top moment we want our kids to experience, even on a regular basis?  It takes courage to take a risk, but the result is more courage! Excitement! Confidence!  

This I want: to inspire my children to go for it, to dance, to reach and stretch themselves, to have a willingness to try.  For if they can do that even in the small things, like a silly soccer practice, what limits have they when it comes to fulfilling their mission and God's plan for their life?  

so proud of you baby!

xoxo 

mom

What's your homeschooling culture?

So, tell me. How exactly do you homeschool?  I mean, how do you put it all together and do it? Could I have a copy of your schedule? Your lesson plans? Your reading list? Your educational plan? Your typical routine?

Remember back to when you first started homeschooling.  Were these questions ever burning inside of you?  Maybe you didn't come out and ask other homeschooling moms, maybe you did, maybe you asked your mentor and she emailed you entire pdf documents with her year-plans, schedules, booklists, and projected purchases for the upcoming year ... I'm just sayin.   'Cause there comes a point when you have made the decision to home-educate, you've perhaps alligned with a particular philosophy or method, you've even bought curriculum, but then ...

The question of how to do it is particularly poignant when it comes to Leadership Education.  Its based on principles and not on methodology, no how-to manual; precisely because it is not based on a "conveyor-belt" model that characterizes how our schools deliver education today. 

The real question should be: How do I do it?

And whether your philosophy is TJEd, Charlotte Mason, Montessori, Classical, etc., ultimately you become the expert of your own homeschool.  You adopt bits of this and that, you feel out the routines and schedules that work for your family, you experiment here and there.  It becomes your personal homeschool culture and develops over time, and that is why no one homeschool looks the same as another.  The only commonalities among homeschoolers seem to be the core values of sanctity of children, and the primacy of the family.  Which is why homeschool culture and family culture go hand in hand.

I have been deeply pondering homeschool and family culture; they are so similar.  Webster's has several definitions for culture, two of them apply here:  "a set of shared attitudes, values, goals and practices; also the characteristic features of everyday existence."

Applied, this becomes the way your family or homeschool forms itself - your rules, roles, habits, activities, beliefs, etc.   So ask yourself, what are your special values and beliefs?  How does your family have fun? Are you connected to a faith community? What are your family rules and traditions? How do you parent? What are your family's talents?  What is your family charism - for example do you all have a thing for music? hospitality? service? outdoor life? What about your homeschool?

We have some definite isms, our family.  Later in the evening, after the littles are in bed and the house is quiet, our olders will eventually make their way to hubby and I and we sit and we talk about everything and nothing.  Happens every night without fail.  Another ism, we always always always gather on Sunday evenings for a family Rosary.  Love that.  We should do it more often but I'm thankful for even the Sundays.  And in our homeschool?  We do our work in the mornings.  I protect mornings.  We value a little tea-time and snack on most days.  We value our games, and we value our read-aloud/discussion times.  We value our babies and little ones in the mix of the olders. We value our love of learning. It is our rhythm, our culture.

What about you?

You are so unique. And wonderful.  And an amazing reflection of our Creator. Your family, too, has its own beautiful culture, homeschooling or otherwise.  I want to tell you not to be afraid to step into it and embrace it more fully.  If you're homeschooling, I want to tell you: Have confidence. Be secure. Pray lots. And don't try to follow the crowd because it won't work for you.   

So, tell me. What's your family culture? What's your homeschooling culture?  I'd love to hear.

God bless your week!

Thomas Jefferson Education ... and me

About six years ago, I read A Thomas Jefferson Education and was completely astounded, mesmerized, blown away, all of that.  The philosophy was amazing and captivating to me.  It is a must-read for anyone interested in exploring education outside the box.

And I've continued to have a small love affair with TJEd aka Leadership Education ever since, but never quite implementing the entire philosophy, never quite going all the way with it.  I read and devour everything written about it, I download the talks and other goodies which are always inspiring, and I ponder. I dream.  I pray.  I implement only what I like.  But something always holds me back from jumping all in, and I think that's a good thing.  You should be able to trust your gut, your instincts when it comes to how you foster your children's education in your own home.  Right?

Yet, there is something to be said for this TJEd way of life and I do incorporate LOTS of elements.  Maybe the purist TJEders would be offended, I don't know.  Is it possible to adopt certain ways and parts of something into your homeschool without going whole hog?  That's a good question :).

Let me begin at the beginning with TJEd, just to give you a little background.  The cornerstone principles, as explained in the book linked above, are called the "Seven Keys of Great Teaching," and here they are:

1. Classics, Not Textbooks
2. Mentors, Not Professors
3. Inspire, Not Require
4. Structure Time, Not Content
5. Simplicity, Not Complexity
6. Quality, Not Conformity
7. You, Not Them

Some have added an eighth principal, that is "Secure, not Stressed."  THAT was a good idea, because implementing the principles in totality takes a great leap of faith!  

Lately, I have been VERY excited about principle #7, You, Not Them.  Essentially, you have to educate yourself before you can pass on any inspiration to others.  Ever read a classic? No? Then that's where you begin.  Ever discuss a classic with someone else? No? Then do that.  Need to inspire your kids to enjoy math? Then read a math classic and get excited about it, pass it on to your kids.  You see? Your education is really a key to your child's education.  If you are excited about something, they will want to know what all the fuss is about.  So, I continually work on my own education, and for me that has taken the form of reading classics.  I read for myself, but also with an eye to recommending it (or not) to my kids.

LOVE the Kindle for this.  Most of the classics are free downloads, so you really have a wonderful library right at your fingertips and not taking up space.  Here's a taste of what books I'm currently breathing:

Mansfield Park by Jane Austen

Miss B is also reading, we go to Starbucks every other Monday night to discuss the plot and characters, GREAT bonding time with my teen! This book is chalk full of tongue-in-cheek humor as it comments on charm versus virture in the Victorian era. An interesting romance! 

Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle

I've just finished previewing this with kids in mind. Ms.L'Engle is one of the top ten banned authors in many Christian Schools.  Yet, the book has been critically acclaimed.  It keeps popping up as a classic and I think I would feel I was missing something by not reading. Its actually quite good!  I think it would make a great read-aloud and that way you could discuss the very few elements that might spur some questions regarding faith issues.

If Protestantism is True by Devin Rose

Hubby and I are reading/have read. This book is one of the very best Catholic apologetics books I've ever read.  Rather than bantering over this Scripture verse or that, (because you can always seem to find verses to support either viewpoint), Devin Rose uses logic and reasoning (my kinda language!) to answer common Protestant issues.  LOVE it.

Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card

I'm reading with an eye for my 12 yo son, but its going to be a no-go.  The book is disturbing to me, full of mature themes that are unpleasant, and quite a bit of swearing. I found this book suggestion among a list of "50 books for boys and young men", on the blog "Art of Manliness" HERE.  Many of the recommended books do look good though.

You, Not Them.

Enjoy the journey!!